With terrifying bunnies taking up residence in the local mall, my mind has drifted back to my childhood. Mainly, it has strayed to the memories of me in various frilly frocks my mother loved to dress me in. As a teenager I used to think, “What was she doing? I look ridiculous.” Now I’ve reached the age where I squeal and say, “I can’t wait to potentially torture my own daughter! She’ll look so cute.” And she’ll hate those outfits too.
Whenever I see a bunny like the one pictured above I want to scream. Is it any wonder that children scream and cry when placed in this weird mutated bunny’s lap? I mean, it has buttons sewn into his/her skin. Why has the bunny been tortured with pom pom limb additions?
This was the simple little bunny from my childhood–>
If I go to the mall down the street and see a bright pink girl Peter and then travel across town and see another Peter decked out with his blue “buttons” I’m going to wonder how they completed that surgical procedure so fast with such a short recovery time. I can just see my future spawn peppering me with questions that I can’t (and really don’t want) to answer. My vote to avoid this dilemma is for an androgynous bunny. In the movie (yeah, that’s right, who remembers this movie?), our furry deliverer of goodies, Peter Cottontail, is a boy, but in reality Peter can be a guy, girl, or androgynous. We need more androgynous names in the world! Help me add Peter to the list. Or put some clothes on the damn bunny so it doesn’t matter! Guys can wear dresses, girls can wear trousers, and we’ll all go home happy. And now I’m done.